


Symphony of the Dead

by the_iron_shadow



Category: Star Wars Episode VII: The Force Awakens, Star Wars Episode VIII: The Last Jedi
Genre: Drama, Epic Battles, F/M, Lots of drama, are the resistance truly the good guys?, galatic politics, kylo ren is actually kind of a good leader, maybe too much philosophy, mostly from rey's pov, rey is trying to find her place, slow beginning but i promise it gets interesting, the force bond
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-03-27
Updated: 2018-05-07
Packaged: 2019-04-13 22:34:17
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 5
Words: 4,203
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14122269
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/the_iron_shadow/pseuds/the_iron_shadow
Summary: Three months since she closed the Falcon door in his face. Three months, and the Force Bond has been silent. Three months, and Rey is losing hope.





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> well, here we go. in the desolation between episode eight and episode nine, the fanfiction arises.
> 
> p.s. any ideas on what the title for episode nine should be?

There had been a month in which her stomach had flipped over at the slightest noise and she’d whirled around at the smallest of movements. Each time, however, she’d been greeted with nothing but the walls of the Falcon and a random rebel who would furtively apologise for disturbing her and then would scurry off. Eventually, she stopped hoping, stopped twitching whenever she saw someone wearing the colour black. It was over, she told herself.

He wanted nothing to do with her. Still, his face haunts her dreams. The expression he’d worn when she’d seen him last, kneeling on the floor, his eyes broken and full of pain—

She can’t, no matter how hard she tries, erase that from her memory.

 

 

Today, she is alone on the Falcon. The others have left to scout out the new planet they’ve landed on, to see if the old rebel base here is usable.

She sits cross legged on the floor, trying to meditate. She’s not quite sure how to do it— the most instruction she’s ever received was from Luke’s lesson about reaching out and feeling the Force.

When she’d asked Leia, the General had been annoyingly vague. “I was never really one for meditation.”

Well, she has somewhat of an idea. Sit upright, cross your legs, breath deeply, and hum. She assumes the rest of it will come as she practices.

“Hmmmm...”

This is stupid, she thinks, letting her hands fall to her sides. But what else is she supposed to do? The books she took from the island are about philosophy and the history of the Jedi, not about how to train beginners.

That’s what she is, isn’t it? A beginner. There’s no one to teach her how to use the Force, how to save the Resistance, or even how to interact with other people. Luke is dead, Leia’s never learned, and the one other person who could teach her isn’t an option anymore.

She’s alone.

_You’re not alone._

The echo of a memory, one that makes her heart clench.

She’d had so much hope, then, that he would turn, that he would join her, that maybe, together, they wouldn’t be alone.

Even now, when she knows that he is her enemy, that he is the Supreme Leader and he is trying to kill her, she can’t help but think of the vision she’d seen: the two of them, side by side, the Force a roaring song that united them, tying them together and making them one.

But then he’d asked her to rule with him, and she knew that then, fighting Snoke’s guards, was the only time that they would ever stand together.

Rey uncrosses her legs, flopping down on the cold floor. There seems to be a shortage of everything among the Resistance, leaving her to wear her old clothing, which left her shoulders bare and exposed to the cold of the ship.

If she asks, Poe or Finn would probably scrounge up a jacket for her. But she doesn’t, because they’re busy enough already.

Finn… he’s been sent off on longer and longer missions ever since Rose recovered, so she hasn’t seen him as often.

Poe… is still a bit of a mystery to her. He’s taken command of most of the Resistance, leaving Leia as more of a symbol than anything else. She’s only really ever talked to him on official business, or when Finn is there to keep the conversation alive.

Maybe she should make a greater effort to reach out to them, to interact. But ever since Leia had taken the majority of the remaining Resistance fighters to Reamma, she had been mostly alone.

Again, the word strikes a note deep within her, the discordant beginning of a song, or perhaps the end of one.

_You’re not alone._

How could she have been so blind as to believe that it was true? It was hope, but it was groundless; why would he join her, a nothing? A nobody, from nowhere, with nothing but desperation and a few party tricks to her name.

And even now, when they have gone their separate ways, when the bond between them has fallen silent, she still hopes.

She closes her eyes, doing her best to relax on the uncomfortable floor. Rey brings up the mental image of him after he’d killed Snoke, his eyes burning into her.

She imagines him choosing differently, that he would stand with her, that together they would restore the Republic.

It’s a broken dream, but it’s all she has left.


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> aaaaaaaaand, the hint of a plot finally makes an entrance.  
> enjoy!

Rey is awoken unceremoniously to the sound of Chewie roaring from the other side of the ship. The sound isn’t immediately recognisable to her, and she jumps to her feet, reaching for a weapon that isn’t there.

But no, it’s just Chewie, yelling for her to wake up and come to the game table. Something about a message.

She sighs, letting her hands drop. The broken lightsaber half is safely locked in one of the smuggling holds, far from the wandering eyes of the Resistance. She’d keep it with her, but there are too many memories tied to it.

Chewie’s yelling again, something about the Resistance and... flowers?

She’s still working on her Shyriiwook, so she could be wrong.

The Resistance, though, that’s definitely important. She stretches, bones popping, and then makes her way to the game table.

There’s a holo sitting on the table, displaying Poe Dameron’s head. She slides into the seat next to Chewie, giving Poe a little wave.

“Rey,” he says, his voice relieved. “You’re here.”

He looks more tired than she remembers, bags under his eyes and lines etched on his brow. Then again, she doesn’t look any younger. War has been kind to no one.

“What’s up?” she asks.

“We need you and Chewie here as soon as possible. Our last reconnaissance mission to Naboo got us three more X-wings, and we’re going to use them.”

Over the past three months, they’ve managed to buy, steal, and cobble together sixteen X-wings. These new three will make nineteen.

“What’s the target?”

“Intelligence reports from one of our spies have checked out. Five Upsilon-class command shuttles are leaving Kuat tomorrow, carrying twelve essential people. If we can knock them out, we’ll both destabilise the First Order and gain access to the orbiting shipyards.”

“Who’s on them?”

They must be important if Poe is willing to risk losing their limited fighters.

Poe hesitates before answering. “The Knights of Ren.”

A chill runs through her.

“What?”

“They’re being recalled to the First Order,” he says. “We assume that Kylo Ren wants them back to protect himself and solidify his position as the new Supreme Leader.”

She doesn’t know much about the Knights, other then the fact that they are very, very bad news. Highly trained warriors, of whom Kylo—Ben—is the leader.

“Why do you need me and Chewie?” she asks, glancing over at the wookiee in question. He must have heard this before, because he looks unsurprised by any of it.

Poe grimaces. “We’re going to be boarding their ships, if all goes according to plan. But rumour says that at least one of the Knights is force sensitive. We want you there in case the rumours turn out to be true.”

Force sensitive Knights? If that’s true, and one or more of them are force sensitive, there’s little that a regular rebel can do. They’d be overpowered in seconds.

“Okay,” she says. “Fill me in on everything else when we get there.”

“Will do,” he says. “Chewie has the coordinates. See you in a little bit.”

He makes a sloppy salute, which she returns.

The holo winks out, and she’s left staring at the lines on the game table.

At some point, Chewie gets up, saying something about plotting their course.

She’s still staring at the table, her thoughts whirling.

If Ben—Kylo—is recalling the Knights, he must be afraid of something. Rey knows, from firsthand experience, that there are few people in the galaxy that could overpower Kylo Ren.

She did so on Starkiller out of sheer luck and a desperation to stay alive.

Why, then, does Kylo Ren, one of the most powerful people in the galaxy, and one of the last Force users, need the Knights of Ren?

As she thinks about it, she realises that she’s never seen him scared. Apprehensive, yes. Surprised, yes. But even in the elevator, even when they’d been standing before Snoke, she hadn’t felt fear from him. He’d been careful to keep his emotions under wraps.

So what is scaring him now?


	3. Chapter 3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> we’re picking up pace here... hopefully it’s not too fast.  
> enjoy!

The journey through hyperspace doesn’t take long. She spends the time carefully picking at the broken lightsaber. She doesn’t know how to fix it, but she’s been slowly taking it apart when she has the time, before carefully locking it back up again when she had to leave.  
She’ll be going into battle against trained warriors without her lightsaber.  
The thought makes her uneasy.  
Rey is used to having a weapon—the slingshot she’d used when she was younger, her staff, the lightsaber—she’s always needed something to protect herself with. Every now and then, Unkar Plutt would send one of his lackeys after her, looking for more scrap metal, and she’d be forced to defend herself.  
Being on the Falcon, with Chewie, has made her complacent, and it’s been weeks since she’s last fought somebody.  
She’s gone through the forms for her lightsaber, practicing the things she can remember Luke mentioning and mimicking the few diagrams in the Jedi books. But without the actual blade, the movements are meaningless.  
With a sigh, Rey packs up the pieces of the lightsaber. She runs her fingers along the kyber crystal, wincing as she feels the deep crack.  
_Teeth bared, screaming, both their desperation, she has to win this—_  
They’d destroyed the blade, and she wonders if he kept his half. Had he simply discarded it, thrown it away and let it die, like his past?  
Instinctively, she reaches out through the Force, searching for him. _Ben?_  
As always, there is no response. The bond is silent, and she gives up after a moment.  
It’s just as well, because the Falcon is getting ready to land on Daver Kuat, the closest habitable planet to Kuat itself. She should get her stuff together and prepare.  
She doesn’t have much, but she leaves most of her things behind.  
She starts to pull her hair into the three buns she’s so used to, before shaking it out and tying it into the partial ponytail she wore when she left Ach-To. She does her best to ignore the reminder of who she was going to when she left.  
At the last minute, she grabs her staff and straps it to her back before leaving the Falcon.

 

Finn is waiting for her at the bottom of the landing ramp, a grin on his face that could light up the world.  
“Rey!”  
They embrace, and she realises how much she’s missed this, a simple hug.  
It’s one of her favourite things about Finn; how he makes it seem like they’ve never been apart.   
“How’ve you been?” she asks, smiling so large she thinks her face might break.  
“Great! Everything’s going great, we’ve gotten three new recruits, and Poe says that after this mission we’ll be able to rebuild more of our fleet.”  
“That’s really good,” she says. “How’s Rose?”  
She’d left with Chewie before she’d gotten a good chance to get to know the girl who Finn talks about nonstop. From what she’s heard, however, Rose sounds like a vibrant person, the kind that people want to be around.  
“She’s good,” Finn says. “She suggested that you, me, Poe, and her hang out, go to a bar or something, after this mission.”  
Rey nods, warming up to the idea quickly. “I’d love to do that, honestly. Chewie’s great company, but we don’t exactly have a lot in common.”  
Finn’s still laughing when she sees Poe duck out from under one of the makeshift tents the Resistance has set up. He still looks tired, but he’s more animated then he was through the holo.  
He approaches with a smile much like Finn’s, already wearing his flight suit. “You arrived just in time,” he says, throwing his arm over her shoulder. He does the same to Finn, steering them towards the tent he just came out of. “The schedule’s been sped up. We’re launching in two hours.”  
“Let’s do this,” Finn says. He high-fives Poe and then turns back to Rey. “I’ll explain the attack plan while we suit up.”  
She wrinkles her nose, confused. “Suit up?”  
They’ve never had to suit up before. If they have, she wasn’t part of the mission.  
“Didn’t you know?” Poe asks, a little too innocently. “We’re carving our way into their ships.”


	4. Chapter 4

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> forgetting to post? in my fanfic?  
> it’s more likely than you think.

She’s behind a screen, pulling on skin-tight suit as Finn talks.

“...and so basically, we’re launching ourselves into space so as to cut holes in their ships.”

“Who came up with this idea?” she asks, a little doubtful.

“Poe did,” says Finn cheerfully.

She rolls her eyes. “I should have guessed.”

The suit isn’t uncomfortable, per say, but it’s not anything she’s used to. She stretches her arms and then tries a high kick. The fabric, whatever it is, flows smoothly, allowing her plenty of mobility. Yes, Rey could fight in this.

She walks out from behind the screen, still testing out the suit. Finn’s dressed identically to her: the black suit, black boots, and a helmet tucked under his arm.

“And how many people are launching with us?”

“Eight,” he says. “We’re taking out the lead ship.”

It’s actually not too bad of a plan. The radar systems on the shuttles won’t pick up on small, fast-moving lifeforms, giving the Resistance the element of surprise. Their goal is to kill the Knights of Ren and to destroy or take over as many shuttles as they can.

“Only eight others? Doesn’t that seem like not enough?”

Finn sighs. “Most of the rebels have no hand-to-hand training. They know how to use a blaster, and that’s about it. For this operation, we’ll be in cramped hallways, where an untrained rebel is a liability. You and I are some of the only ones who know how to fight in close quarters.”

She’s not the best in enclosed spaces. Maybe it was the constant openness of Jakku, but she prefers places where she can spread her arms without bumping into a wall. But she can use the Force, and she knows how to fight, so it’ll all balance out in the end.

Hopefully.

 

Poe’s giving orders when they come out of the tent. The X-wings are moving into formations, ready to launch. Technicians run from ship to ship, making last minute checks of the systems. Their pilots stand next to them, saying their goodbyes.

Finn directs her towards a separate ship, one that reminds her of old Imperial shuttles. “This is where we’ll be launching from,” he says. “The others will be coming in a minute or two. You’ll do great.”

Poe pauses to look over at them, and gives Finn a tight smile. “May the Force be with you,” he mouths.

Finn mouths it back, and as he turns to Rey again, he looks far more serious. “You’ll do great,” he repeats. “This is a guaranteed win.”

Rey’s not so sure, but she smiles and nods. “Thanks. May the Force be with you.”

“And with you,” Finn says. “C’mon, let’s go.”

Everything’s a whirlwind as he leads her up the ramp and helps her strap herself into the first in a row of seats. She places her helmet on her lap, her legs bouncing up and down as she watches the others file in. They take their places, and their leader, a woman whose name Rey forgets almost immediately, gives them their blades.

The blade is about as long as her forearm, and has a small button on the hilt to activate it. When turned on, the blade vibrates at a frequency that can cut through metal.

She balances it in her hand, testing the weight. It’s not a lightsaber, that’s for sure, but it’ll have to do.

She straps it to her calf, following the movements of those around her.

“Launching in three minutes,” an automated voice announces.

Finn says something about how cool the blade is, and she tries to keep up her end of the conversation. It’s hard, with apprehension chilling her bones, and Finn notices, because he pats her shoulder and falls silent.

Launch happens without any problems, and the trip through hyperspace barely rattles the shuttle.

Far too soon, it’s time to go.

“Line up,” the woman barks. “We’re jumping as soon as those door open.”

Rey moves with Finn to the left side of the shuttle, where the first bay door is.

They pull on their helmets, a hiss signalling that they’ve been sealed.

Finn squeezes her hand. She smiles, even though he can’t see it. It’s going to be fine, she thinks. They’re just jumping into the cold vacuum of space, with only a thin suit protecting them from death.

As one does.

They hook their hands and feet onto the wall just before the doors open, sucking all the air out.

There, below her, is her mark. Rey takes a deep breath, reaching out with the Force, and sending a silent prayer to whatever gods are listening.

She jumps, feet first, and then the stars are flashing by her faster than ever before and everything is fading away except for the pounding of her heart. She’s dimly aware of Finn and the others trailing behind her.

It seems like an eternity between her jump and when her feet collide with the hard metal of the ship.

She pulls the blade from the sheath on her calf, carelessly activating it.

This, she can do. This is easy.

Rey jams the blade into a metal joint, admiring the way it slices through the metal. They’ve cut through the hull in the seconds, and then they’re dropping down through the hole they’ve carved.

They’re halfway down a darkened hallway when she senses him, the hum of the ship fading away as she turns to meet his gaze.


	5. Chapter 5

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> hmmm. i'm not very good at fight scenes, but hopefully i'll improve.

Two heartbeats, and neither of them move. She’s frozen in place, trapped by his eyes.

He’s looking at her with a sad smile on his face, as if he can read her thoughts, can see the panic swirling within her.

All the things she’d planned on telling him, all the curses she’d wanted to scream at him, all the tearful words she’d imagined—it all fell away as she stared at him. He looks tired, dark circles under his eyes, and he’s changed his outfit; instead of the tunic she’d last seen him in, he wears a long black cloak with red embroidery along the hem.

“Why now?” he asks, his voice deep and full of resignation. “Why now, after all this time?”

Rey doesn’t get the chance to answer before he disappears.

Shaken, she continues through the ship, trying to forget what just happened. She has a job right now, and it does not involve agonising over him.

There are new bodies every couple steps, having already been knocked out by Finn, in order to leave her path clear.

 _The control room_ , he’d said. _I'll take care of pilot, and you deal with any Knights._

If there even are Knights in this ship. She hasn’t met anyone yet.

She steps over a man’s body and then, before she can process it, she’s thrown against the wall.

The attacker stalks toward her, and she struggles to pull herself up, switching on her blade.

From the faint light of her blade, she can make out a dark figure with a metal mask not unlike the one Kylo wore.

“So you’re the Jedi we’ve heard so much about.”

The darkness of the corridor makes it near impossible to determine facial details, but she knows that this is one of the Knights.

“The holos really make you sound so much more... intimidating.”

She snarls, and they laugh, the sound echoing through the room as she scrambled to her feet. “All that stuff about how you killed the Supreme Leader, was it even true?”

It takes a second for their words to process, but when they do, rational thought falls away. Through the Force, she can sense their arrogance, and she wants nothing more than to strip it away.

She dives forward, slashing at their legs, but the blade she was given isn’t meant for hand-to-hand combat. The quick movement makes the glowing cutting edge flicker.

The figure steps back easily, pulling out their own weapon and igniting it.

The red glow of a lightsaber fills the corridor, and Rey curses at her luck. She’ll have to win this fight quickly, before they can overpower her.

Stab, dodge, feint—the heat of their saber sears her arm, not strong enough to wound her, but enough to serve as a reminder of danger.

She kicks out, managing to knock them off balance, and follows up with a devastating swing to their head. They barely block it, and Rey hears the audible crack as her blade starts to bend.

 _No!_ she thinks, sliding back a step as they push back.

There’s another crack, and she knows that at any moment, her blade will snap in half and she’ll be weaponless against a lightsaber.

This can’t be happening, she’s the last Jedi, and she’s supposed to win—

A voice enters her head, calm where her own thoughts are panicked. _You forget the Force, Rey. Everything can be a weapon._

Everything can be a weapon?

Everything...

Rey reaches out mentally, sweeping the landscape for anything she could use. There’s a pile of boxes two rooms down, but that’s too far away. The closest room is locked with a durasteel door, and the only other thing...

Everything can be a weapon.

Her stomach rolls, but at least now she’s found something.

Rey takes a deep breath, staring into the mask covering the face of the Knight. “Did I kill Snoke? What do you think?”

They tilt their head to the side, and Rey takes her chance.

She throws herself to the right, letting go of the blade just as their lightsaber finally cuts through it. She’s on the floor, and they’re bearing down on her, raising their saber to deal the kill stroke—

She curls her fingers, and the dead body of a man smashes into the Knight, impaling itself into his saber.

The Knight stumbles back, and Rey takes her chance, yanking on the strings of the Force and pulling the dead man back, suspending him in the air between them. His head hangs at an odd angle, and she swallows her nausea before closing her eyes and letting the Force wash over her.

This time, when the Knight attacks, she’s ready, using the man as shield.

Rey almost slips on what she thinks is blood, and she knows that she has to end this fight now, before the terrain gets any worse.

With the Force flowing through her like an extension of her body, she doesn’t hesitate, flicking her hand and making the body slam into the sword hand of the Knight, making him drop the saber.

There’s the sound of bones breaking, and Rey’s not sure whose bones they were, because she’s too busy diving for the fallen saber.

The Knight struggles to push the dead body off, and in the time it takes for them to get free, Rey has attained the lightsaber.

She twirls it, just enjoying the feeling of finally, finally, having a saber in her hands again.

The Knight lashes out, maybe trying to the saber back, but Rey is faster. Their head is rolling on the floor in a heartbeat.

A voice startles her, and she spins, taking on an offensive crouch with the saber, ready to kill again. But it’s only Finn, with a look of pure horror on his face. “Rey,” he says. “I, uh...”

He gestures vaguely, and Rey comes to her senses.

She’d just killed a Knight. And she’d done it using a dead man. She’d given in completely to Darkness in that moment, using her anger to snuff out a life.

“Oh, goddess,” she says, taking a step back. “Finn, how much did you see?”

“You beheaded him,” he says, still looking like he’s seen a ghost. “Rey, are you...”

His voice trailed off, and Rey realises she’s still brandishing the saber. She quickly deactivates it, clipping it to her belt.

“Is the rest of the ship clear?” she asks, her tone sharp.

“Yeah,” Finn says. “We’re ready to get out of here, if you’re ready.”

“Let’s go,” she says, maybe a little too fast. “Poe will want us to report our... success.”

Finn doesn’t respond. He’s staring at the Knight’s body, and Rey finds herself wishing she’d dispatched of him in a neater manner.

Not that she’d spared him.

No, she regretted that she had gotten blood on the floor.

What was happening to her?

**Author's Note:**

> all feedback, whether positive or negative, is appreciated :)  
> my updating schedule is going to be kind of random, but I hope to update semi-regularly.


End file.
